FO News Roundup: March 19, 2009

• The Pope is in Africa telling people that it's a sin to use condoms. "Every sperm is sacred" is still Church policy, apparently — even if "African lives are sacred" isn't. (P)
• I'm not convinced a "we'll deduct the bonuses from their next bailout" policy is going to disperse the angry mobs. (P)
• Good Cop, Bad Cop: President Bush says he won't sit on the sidelines and carp about President Obama. (That's Cheney's job.)
• They actually used the word "Barack-etology." God help us. (P)
• "I weigh all the facts. Then I throw those out and think about what God would want. Then I ignore that and do what every Cheney tells me to do." But what are you gonna write on the other 499 pages? Find out for yourself in the eagerly anticipated Decision Points! (M)
• "We need to get the economy going again so let's all stop working" goes the logique française as they take to the streets to protest the economic crisis. No this is not an accidental reprint of last month's news. (M)
• Is there anything cooler than an underwater volcano erupting? (M)